Okay, I have a confession to make. I've already gotten over the horrendousness of the fact that I pick my nose. This is different. Are you ready?

I'm obsessed with Spider Solitaire. I play ten or eleven games a day. I'm concentrating on the win rate; I've told myself that if I get a rate of more than half, I can go on to the next level. I breezed through the Easy level in a week of nine games. I've now played 429 games and I'm at 35% and rising.

Of course, it's not the win rate, really. I'm bored and this provides good entertainment. I'm working on my Dryad story, but the ideas that are molding the final details of this world-building process are being triggered by a book. And the book is not easy-going. I started it in January. I'm at the last fifty pages or so. It's slow going, and if I read too much of it in one sitting, I fall asleep. Reminds me of the summer reading assignments for high school honors courses; I'd get through them eventually, but I just had to factor in all the naps they triggered.

So I'm using this game to combat the laziness of summer. Of course, these naps are different than the hibernation of winter. They have a different mood somehow. They're lighter and shorter and don't feel like an escape from the cold. But Spider, once I got over the slight chills that the arachnid logo gives me, gives me an escape from the lack of summer reading assignments.

And it feels okay to be obsessed. My parents both did stuff in the months before I was born, in their apartment in Albuquerque. Mom watched I Love Lucy. Every time it aired, she was there, laughing along. And Dad got addicted to Pacman. All the psychedelic blinking seems very similar to the twitch my head gets when my eyes can't focus on the cards because I'm hungry. Of course, is it too out of hand when I can see the cards in my head, rearranging themselves in their eternally changing rows?

The cards in my head seem to always be in the lower digits. Nothing is ever above six and only the immediately accessible cards are visible; I can never see the entire row. And strangely enough, I can see the cards most clearly when I'm in Just'In's arms. Right before he clears everything out of my head.
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